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Blog, Faith, Lifestyle, Marriage

3 Lessons in Celebration of 3 Years with J

malia Lynn 3 year anniversary

first look malia Lynn

first look before ceremony

first look malia Lynn

first look malia lynn

3 year anniversary malia Lynn

Coming up this month, on June 13, is our third wedding anniversary. Last year, I celebrated on the blog by sharing a very personal post (linked here) of our dating history, talking about why it’s worth it to wait. For this year’s anniversary, I wanted to get personal again by sharing 3 lessons of communication that have made our relationship stronger (what better time than when people expect you to be extra sappy, and actually tolerate it? It’s all about that strategy my friends. Ha!).

Granted, at 3 years, we are hardly experts – but honestly, I don’t think anyone ever is, regardless of the amount of time they’ve been together. Either way, the formula is the same: The daily (and sometimes hourly) choice to love the other person and to not only extend grace but to seek grace from them when you aren’t necessarily being your most lovable self. 

Throughout the last three years, J and I have been through much more than either of us expected on this bright and wonderful day. Most of these experiences have been more than great, like bringing home Toby, trips together, and seeing growth in the Lord within one another. Others have unfortunately been a bit more difficult – the strain caused by law school was a very heavy burden on our household in a number of ways; interference from toxic relationships (everyone has at least one of these people in life, right?! I will happily trade ours for your crazy uncle 😉 ); and a few deaths of loved ones have all weighed pretty heavily on our little family, sometimes all at once. I’m not sharing these parts of the less than joyful side of our marriage in the hopes of getting sympathy, as it isn’t needed. As hard as these moments – sometimes over the span of many months – have been, they’ve also solidified us as a couple much more than any “happy” season ever could.

I thought I trusted Justin with my life on the day we got married, but looking back, I know I was still holding onto the idea of controlling what my life would ideally be like with him in it. Whereas today, I wholeheartedly trust him with my entire person; past, present, future, ugly, pretty, smart, dumb, whole, and broken. He is such a gift that I still wonder why God chose me to be his wife. That doesn’t mean that we always communicate perfectly with one another or that we have a “perfect” marriage. We still and will have days when we both want to bite each other’s heads off. There’s just no such thing as a perfect marriage when there’s a pairing of two imperfect people. But y’all, grace abounds from this man. Throughout these last three years, he has and continues to teach me so much about forgiveness, kindness, and joy.  

As we celebrate three years married and embark on our fourth year, I am definitely going to be focusing on these 3 lessons of communication that we have learned and worked on together. I love these, because they can be used in literally any relationship, at any stage:

1. Be Intentional

Spending time together sometimes needs to planned, and when it is, be present. Put the phones away and focus on the other person. Being intentional also applies to the words you speak. You have the ability to choose what you say to someone, so choose wisely. The freedom to be vulnerable in relationships is so important, and it’s much more difficult to repair trust than it is to destroy it through thoughtless words or actions.

2. Be Honest

You know what happens when you bottle things up for too long? You explode. Not only that, but you aren’t giving the other person a chance to fix it or even know what is bothering you. (Tim Keller discusses this very concept much more eloquently in The Meaning of Marriage – which I highly recommend!) You may think you’re being the bigger person by not saying anything, but usually you’re just setting yourself up for an unnecessary meltdown. When you choose to share what’s going on, be intentional with what you say and how you say it. You’re on the same team. This also means being honest with your own heart and mind. Did you just catch yourself using a not-so-nice tone? Don’t wait for the other person to say something about it for you to own it and apologize. Be accountable and honest with you. 

3. Be Quiet

I know this is an ironic one to follow the “Be Honest” tip, but just roll with it. Sometimes when venting, the other person doesn’t want advice. It can be hard to resist the urge to jump in and start explaining all the ways they can fix the issue. But, as much as we want to help our spouses and loved ones, sometimes what they need more in that moment is just for someone to listen. If you really think you know the answer to what is causing their angst, then when they are finished, ask if they want you to speak into it. Most of the time, that answer will probably be yes, but if it isn’t, be willing and ready to respect their wishes.

 

Thank you for celebrating with us by taking the time to read this post. We love and appreciate all of you more than you know! If you are interested in reading more about what I’ve learned from Lesson #2, I’ve included the links to the original book as well as its study guide companion below:

 

 

xoxo, M

 

 

 

 

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Beauty, Blog

My Top 10 Sephora Sale Picks

sephora vib sale

The Sephora VIB Sale is such a great opportunity to try new products and to restock personal favorites with up to a 15% discount!

sephora vib sale

sephora vib sale

If you’ve been watching my instagram stories over the last couple of weeks, you’ve already heard about my first, and all-time, favorite pick: REN Ready Steady Glow Daily AHA Tonic – yall, I cannot express how much of a game changer this tonic has been for my skin. I love how it’s completely transformed my skin’s texture and clarity. Plus, the bottle is huge and a complete steal as its price is only $35 (that’s without the 15% discount!).

Included below is my full list of my top ten picks:

  1. REN Ready Steady Glow Daily AHA Tonic
  2. Bobbi Brown Face Mist
  3. Laura Mercier Lip Glace
  4. NARS Soft Matte Complete Concealer
  5. Kat Von D Lock-It Edge Foundation Brush (featured in this post!)
  6. Kat Von D Lock-It Edge Concealer Brush
  7. Kat Von D Lock-It Setting Powder
  8. TATCHA Pore-Perfecting Moisturizer & Cleanser Duo
  9. STILA Huge Extreme Lash Mascara
  10. Peter Thomas Roth Acne Duo

What are your absolute favorite, beauty must-haves? I am always up for trying out new products and would love to hear your recommendations!

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xoxo, M

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Blog, Lifestyle, Travel, Updates

Travel Outfit Essentials + Life Update!

travel outfit essentials

travel outfit essentials

longchamp travel bag

carry on travel bags

longchamp travel bag

travel bags

Pink Carry-on // Leggings // Black Tennis Shoes // LA Cap // Black Zip-up Bag (Expandable!) // Favorite Cardigan // Top

Oh my gosh, y’all, it’s been a minute.

Seriously a hot minute full of these past crazy two 1/2 months of bar prep isolation, but I am finally free (for now) and so hyped to get back into the real world & back in touch with all of you!

For this two-day exam extravaganza, I used my favorite go-to travel essentials = this expandable nylon bag and my pink rolling carry-on. The black longchamp is a bit of an investment, but I cannot recommend it more! I’ve had the same one now for over 5 years – it’s been with me to over 5 countries, and everywhere else in between, yet still looks brand new! If you’re looking for a new travel bag, I definitely recommend checking this one out – as it’s been a lifesaver for when I’ve needed more space to bring back souvenirs, and for when I just don’t repack everything as tightly/well I did before leaving on the trip :).

After finishing up the Bar Exam, I met my sweet friends, Emily & Joy, for dinner & spent the night in Chapel Hill 🙌🏻 (For those of you who are new to the blog, UNC is where I went to undergrad, so any chance I have to stay overnight I happily take). Y’all – these two. There are no words for how much they have blessed my life with their friendship. Through all the good, bad, and beyond ugly, they’ve both been such great sources of steady support, encouragement, and motivation to do better // be better. I am so grateful to even just know them – and 100% of the time am truly intimidated by how crazy smart they are – it’s scary (in a good way).

As it always does, the time with them flew, and now I find myself already back at home with at least five weeks to kill before results come back. It’s a little surreal to say the least. Ideally, I am praying to be done with this part of the “become a state-approved lawyer” process, but it really just depends on some many different elements that are totally out of my hands. Although the statement can sometimes be seen as a cliche, I truly believe that God has a plan (Jeremiah 29:11 !) so, whatever the outcome, His plan is still good. Now, that doesn’t make the possibility of having to retake this exam any less depressing or disappointing, but it does allow me to have peace in knowing that if for some reason I do need to retake it, it’s for a purpose that I know is good and will choose to trust.

ANYWAY, transitioning topics – there’s a TON of new content // changes I’ve been dying to complete, launch, & share with y’all. Not the least of which includes a potential branding overhaul for BBB —> Sharing more on that in the coming weeks (I want y’all to vote on this!). First up though, is (of course) a new DIY project!! Later this week I’ll be sharing an easy TV tray overhaul tutorial <3 Oh – and for those of you who have asked//are interested – I will be sharing a “What/How I Packed for the Bar” post soon as well! If you want tips on staying motivated – check out this post here!

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xoxo, M

 

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Blog, Gift Guides

Galentine’s Day Gift Ideas

galentines day gift guide

Happy February! As y’all know from last year’s post for Galentine’s Day, I love the V day season! It’s a great time to treat your besties, and if you’re feeling extra-extra, yourself as well! It can be such a fun holiday, no matter your relationship status – especially when seen as a bonus opportunity to love a little more on your friends and family. 🙂

Whether you/your besties are into going out and painting the town red, or spending as many evenings at home as physically possible, I’ve tried to pull together as many fun and different ideas to fit any budget/style. Below you’ll see a ton of options, within with you can search using the bar at the top of the box, or just browse through by using the arrows on the right and left sides.

 

xoxo, M

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