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Blog, Faith, Marriage, Relationships

Why You’re Worth the Wait

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In a little over a month, J and I will be celebrating two years of marriage. (Yes, yes, still babies to those who have been married for 10+ years with/without children – disclaimer duly noted) Yet, this upcoming anniversary has had me reflecting more and more on the ever-prevalent question of whether the wait for something “serious” is really worth it.

In a world where DM’s on social media, bad tinder dates, and even worse blind dates seem to run rampant – it’s increasingly difficult to hear things like “Don’t settle” or “Real love is worth the wait.” Well, while I will gladly be the first to admit that I am no relationship or love expert by any means, I hope you’ll allow me to add my voice into the chaotic choir with some personal background on my own marriage that will hopefully provide encouragement to you – no matter what stage of life and/or relationship you are presently experiencing.

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Y’all. This man. Every single day I am more humbled by how he continues to choose me and love me no matter what the season has brought us. The longer we are married, the more clearly I can see how God works through him to strengthen my faith and improve my character. Our journey has not been without its challenges, and we will surely have many more in the future, but facing those unknowns with him put my otherwise anxious-self totally and completely at peace.

Ironically, from the very beginning, of knowing him, I was so ridiculously scared of developing a relationship with J because I knew very early on that he was different. That something was different. This man didn’t play games. He didn’t manipulate my feelings or back out of a “coffee” date not date thing (what even are those, honestly?!). He didn’t pretend to be someone he was not just because “church-culture” said he should show up wearing chaco’s while drinking counterculture coffee with  a moleskin notebook in hand.

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No, instead, Justin was so respectfully direct, honest, and consistent. I could be unbelievably open and real with him, fully sharing everything about myself for the first time in a romantic relationship ever. Completely vulnerable yet completely loved. Sounds wonderful to the point it’s almost magical, right? It was.

So it may surprise you that while all of this was happening, I was simultaneously thinking “Oh no, God. No. No. No. I’m not ready for this. I know I’ve been praying for ‘the one’ and I’ve also been asking to meet and know who ‘the one’ is HA but I was really thinking more along the lines of around 28 maybe even 32 years old, not 21. I can’t. I’m not ready.” Y’all, I panicked. Really and truly panicked. So much so that in spite of this honest heart-knowledge I had of who Justin was and who he was going to be in my life – I gave into fear.

In September of 2014 I broke up with him. Never in my life would I have expected the way my heart responded to this – instead of the wave of relief I was hoping to have from removing the “stress” of such a serious relationship on my plate, relentless waves of THIS WAS NOT THE RIGHT DECISION crashed into and over me – to the point where I thought I would drown from them, barely an hour after having “the final talk” with him.

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As someone who is rarely “emotional” – this strong reaction furthered my fear. Like WOAH NOW hold on a second here, all the stress from senior year at Carolina must have really done me in! I’m supposed to be this steady, ultra-reasonable person. Why am I feeling like the entire world is crashing down? That’s so melodramatic and not even close to what is the norm for me. I remember calling my mom bawling from pure confusion combined with the mess of it – trying to understand – trying to grasp why the logical explanation was no where to be found. I was the one who broke it off so why am I suddenly feeling so broken? UGH MORE IRONIC DRAMA THAT I TOTALLY HATE.

I can’t even express how incredibly well she handled this phone call. She listened with patience limiting her own opinions, instead allowing Truth to enter the conversation. There was neither judgment nor selfishness when she spoke to me. Through my mom’s loving support, I was provided with such peace, comfort, and clarity. I sincerely hope that one day, I will be as wise and unselfish as she has been, is, and continues to be for our family.

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After listening to my gurgled jarb of what happened, all my mom said was, “Do you feel any peace with what you did? Any at all? It’s natural for these things to be painful, but I need you to search yourself. Do you feel any bit of peace?” I paused. I searched my heart for anything other than the twisted storm inside me. “No. Mom, I feel like I’m drowning.” And all she responded with was, “Well, you need to call him now. Hopefully it isn’t too late, and hopefully he’s still in Chapel Hill.”

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So I did, hoping he hadn’t already left town and praying he would even answer my call. Little did I know that during this something, or rather, someOne, had made it clear to him that I too was worth the wait. I was worth the heartbreaking confusion, and I was worth the unimaginable patience that it took to sit in Chapel Hill and resist hopping in the car to begin the 2 1/2 hour drive back to Boone. SomeOne told him to be still.

Justin answered my call on the third ring. (Here’s yet another fault of mine I’ll publicly air on the internet, but let’s be real for a hot minute: Had the roles been reversed, that phone call would have been ignored faster than you could’ve blinked. See, here’s the thing: J doesn’t struggle with pride when it comes to grudges from being hurt like I have and still do at times. So the outcome was thankfully very different here.)

And y’all, until the day I die I will never forget how J responded, it was one of the most ultimate displays of grace he could have possibly given me in that moment. The first thing he did when he walked through the door was hug me. What had already been broken inside of me shattered in that moment. I couldn’t even get the words out to apologize, all I could think was, “God, not only am I not ready for this, but I am so not deserving of this kind of love. Holy cow I am so not deserving of this unfailing and steadfast love.”

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… fast forward to now, over 3 years later and I am still not deserving of this kind of forgiving, grace-filled love J chooses to give to me day in and day out. But man oh man, am I ever so immeasurably grateful for the heart and character of this man that God chose for me.

It’s a double-edged sword though, because, at the same time, I completely understand the apathy and cynicism related to the current state of dating. I seriously get it. The repeated, pacifying sayings, I know sound cliche, and I know y’all are so sick of hearing the same “Sunday School” answers – I thought the same thing for years. However, I hope you grant me this moment to share with you that a man who reflects how Jesus loves you in the way he himself chooses to love you… Well. He is absolutely worth the wait. No matter how painful, complicated, or confusing that wait or journey may be. He is so worth it.

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MOST IMPORTANTLY though, you need to know that you are too. God has an incredible plan for you and your life – no matter who you may or may not see running the race beside you right now.

You have not been forgotten. You are loved. You are known. You are valued beyond measure. You are worth being pursued & you are worth the wait. 

Whether you are currently seeing these truths through the actions of another person, or having to trust them on your own for now, their significance holds strong and true.

Christ chose you, and continues to choose you time and time again. You are worthy and you are beautiful. I pray that you come to see and be reminded of these truths in all circumstances and stages of this life. I pray that you come to know – if you don’t already – that you have already been chosen, and you, my friend, are absolutely worth the wait.

 

 

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Beauty, Blog, Gifts, Relationships

Top Gifts for Galentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day aka Galentine’s Day is coming up, meaning that now is the perfect time to figure out what to give your best gal pals (while maybe finding a little something something for yourself along the way).

Oh my gosh, I could, can, and will happily go on and on about how much I love Smith & Cult Nail Polish. It’s durable, beautiful, and makes even the worst skilled nail painter (aka me) look like they just had a fresh manicure.

Top knot and coffee time? Yes, yes please. Make sure your bestie feels as fabulous as she is while drinking her morning coffee in this Gold Lips Mug. Oh, and did I mention it’s only $12? Seriously. It’s only $12 y’all!! 

Even if you have a beau, let’s not forget who Valentine’s Day is really about. It’s us. Go ladies go. Celebrate all the fun with this super sweet Galentine’s Day Pillow from Nordstrom.

And, if going out on Valentine’s Day isn’t the plan for you and your girls, curl up with this fab Faux Fur Throw Blanket to make your Netflix night even cozier.

Kendra Scott is always a good idea. These Elle Drop Earrings  pair well with anything & are perfect for any occasion.


If you haven’t tried Diptyque candles yet, now is definitely the time. This design is limited edition, but it features one of the company’s most popular (and pleasant) scents. Available in two sizes, it’s the perfect selfie or bestie gift.

Last but certainly not least is this Tory Burch Signature Valentine’s Day Set . I’m in love with this scent. It’s classic, elegant, with the right amount of sweetness balanced into the earthy undertones. This set includes a travel roller ball, and the full size spray in addition to the fretwork keepsake box.

Need more ideas? Check out my Ultimate Last Minute Gift Guide for an even wider selection of gifts for you and your bestie!

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Adulting, Blog, Home Decor, School, The Home

Top Organization Tips for 2017

Happy 2017 everyone! If your 2016 was anything like ours, then things may have been a little crazy. J and I are super thankful for the experiences, (and hopefully growth) that have come from 2016, but we are so very happy to enter into 2017 and leave 2016 behind.

In gearing up for the new year and getting refreshed, I thought I would share with you all some of my favorite organization tips and tricks. I’m a huge advocate for an organized home/workspace, and can truly tell a major difference in how I feel and how focused I am when our home is put together. Just look at this eye candy:

From: http://www.thehomeedit.com/blog/2016/2/20/the-x-pencil-and-paper-co-shopping-list
From: http://www.marthastewart.com/1502454/diy-home-projects

 

From: http://www.bloominghomestead.com/2016/02/pantryorganization.html
From: http://www.popsugar.com/home/photo-gallery/37140497/image/37140506/Drawer-Organizers

Even though I love organization, I’m not always the best at actually controlling the whole “stuff” factor. Just ask our realtors, Karin Head and Brad Klosterman from the Head Team, about their meetings with us to minimize and simplify prior to listing our condo back in the summer (more on that here and here).

So, while I am starting a 100 day “purge sesh,” in the mean time I’ve included some of my all time favorite ways to control the mess while getting rid of it as well.
These racks are amazing. They essentially double your cabinet space and provide sooooo much more storage than you would even ever expect. I’m obsessed with them, and LOVE the difference they’ve made in our kitchen.

These bins have been prime time. I first ordered them when we were focused on figuring out how to utilize storage while staging our home. They’re great quality, and almost a year later have held up incredibly well!

I LOVE acrylic storage. Whether it’s for makeup, drawer organization, or just general use, acrylic storage works in any and every type of room. It’s clean-looking (as long as it’s decently organized) and due to its see-through nature you never have to guess what’s where, which is honestly half of the appeal.

Today, I worked on organizing my jewelry and my leaning shelves in my home office:

Funny how even after only four months in a new place my home office preview is no longer as organized/ clean as it was! Time to get refocused and reorganized!

What are your goals for 2017?! I would love to hear them!

 

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Adulting, Blog, Gifts, The Home

Top Picks from PetSmart’s December Sale

petsmartsale

It’s officially December! With that said, this the month full of celebrations and we love any chance we have to add in some extra fun and spoil our pup, Toby! This weekend, December 2-4, PetSmart is having an additional 15% off sale sitewide with free shipping (just use the code GIFTING15), so it’s perfect timing to grab some sweet little stocking stuffers for your fur babies. (I’ve been eyeing that fleece-lined travel seat for a few weeks now and can’t wait to take advantage of the promo this weekend to get it!)

The perfect pup gift guide

I keep trying to convince J to let us get another sweet puppy, the more the merrier, right? So, until then, I will not force Toby into the pink sweater (hehe) and will instead live vicariously though all of you who do have girl dogs walking around with fab leashes like these!

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We will definitely be snagging more of these sweaters this weekend too! As a Yorkie, Toby needs a little
extra warmth in the winter, and he loved snuggling in this fleece one. the perfect pup gift guide the perfect pup gift guide

What are your favorite picks from this sale? Drop a comment below, I’d love to see!

xoxo, M

PetSmart

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